Friday, 12 January 2018

9 Things I've Learnt As A Parent










To be honest, I am totally winging parenthood which is fine by me as I am still growing into being a parent, even though I've been doing it safely to for 3 in a half years now and whilst I am may still be learning as I go along, I can share some of my wisdom that I have learnt since being a parent.

Whilst I am still trying to remember the time B.C (before children) it has me questioning, prior to that time did I really learn anything, well yeah I guess, how to knock back a few Jagerbombs after work and mastered the necessities to get through a hangover (bottle of coke, something in it relieves the hangover and a load of Chinese from Mr Liu, plus pizza for good measure) but I digress, did I?! Well yes, because I knew what council tax and water rates were. No, in terms of the fact that parenting is a whole new dimension, something that no matter how many books you read or a crackdown on Google to research from how to put a nappy on to finding out if you ever get any sleep when your child is older (the answer to that my friend is a big fat NO) you are still learning as you go, but there are things you do learn, 10 things so far. I do hope that they're helpful to someone out there....


1.
whilst I have never been made of stone, I have always had a guard up after being hurt so many times in my life, pre-parenting! But is that really healthy to be like that, no it was not healthy for me, but I tell you something, the moment you give birth or see your baby for the first time, those barriers break and you let your guard down! Whilst I like to think I am no pushover for my child, at times, Leanora knows just how to get me around her little sticky fingers and there is no shame in the game of letting your guard down for the most precious thing in your life and I am so thankful she came into my life and turning me in to mush.


2.
Whilst I have fallen in and out of love countless times in my life, I never experienced a love that is infinite as the one I have for my daughter and is returned in abundance. 


3. 
Parenting is a continuous battle, be it arguing over what to eat, what to wear to preschool, or who is going to feed that cat, I mean we even argue over who is going to lock the door, but whilst we may have silly arguments with our children the endless love and bond that you have makes up for those silly fights, this morning was over which Hotel Transylvania to watch!


4. 
When your child starts attending nursery/school some may thrive or some may hate getting involved with the activities and events organised, I thought I would have been the latter person, but I have to say I love being involved, I think it is great to show support for my daughter, her pre-school and also great support for the community too, I thrive off being involved (except for when I forget to bring a dish in) plus it is a great way to make new parent friends too.


5.
screw adulthood, sometimes we all get that feeling when we just don't want to be adults and I say you know what we all deserve a little kid time, so there is nothing I love more, than a day off dedicating to fun, sticky filled parenting adventure with my bestie.


6.
You always have someone to talk to, have fun with laugh with and cry with (well you cry, they watch with sparkly laughing eyes, when they've just elbowed you in the boob) I am comfortable enough for us to have a clear separation of mother and daughter, but we are close enough for my child to feel comfortable to come and talk to me and ask me anything (for now...until she turns 13 I'm sure it will all change)


7. 
You become your child's teacher, a mentor even your role and duty as a parent is to teach your child right from wrong, to love, to be able to guide them and give them tools in life to succeed and know that they can be anything they want in life. 


8.
So much can change when you become a parent, mothers and fathers, mothers, in particular, are held in a different light at times and your place of work can penalise you for even having to cut back on hours or days, because you are a parent of a child, and I should know it has happened to me. I am a single hard working parent, I always go above and beyond for my employer/clients and I work just as hard as the next person, but I've even come under scrutiny just for not being able to work a particular day that week as I had to take my daughter to the doctors and the look I got was mortification, like I should not take my child to the doctors. It can be hard as a parent to find an employer that truly understands flexible working, but when you do stick with them.


9.
I did not realise the pressures of waiting for the school acceptance into your chosen school. I have only picked three for Leanora and the catchment area is a bitch, you literally for most schools have to live on the road, even then you are not guaranteed a place. It is so frustrating when they take siblings first even when the family has moved out of the area and at times borough. 


What have been some of the things you have learnt since becoming a parent?



London Mumma xx

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