We know it’s hard to find a balance with work and dating life, especially when you reach a certain age! Now, in my 30’s and my 40’s fast approaching my outlook on my career and dating life are far more different than that of my 20’s.
My 20’s were fun, I spent it running wild and free with one guy, until it no longer worked out, to heartbroken and angry to give others a try, I was content, to be free and single and that suited me just fine, fast forward a few years later I decide to focus on my career, my daughter and Milo I was not interested in settling down but building a good foundation around us, plus I love my independence.
Recently I woke up in the middle of the night crying, me crying can you bloody believe it, not bawling, but a little tears! I’m far for the emotional type, but I thought of a guy who I loved, I mean truly loved, like the moment I saw him lost for words love, but that too due to cultural differences it was not destined to happen. it got me thinking and speaking to my bestie for a bit of support, he turned and said to me Lind’s, you’ve got beautiful daughter, career on the up, you give your time to everything but you and in fairness he was not wrong, but can it be done, I mean, be a single parent who works full time, who spends her weekends ferrying her kid from activity to party, to laundry and homework and everything in between can I dare wonder if I could actually have a home, work life and dare I say it dating balance?
Read on to find out how I and you can find that perfect equilibrium between work and dating.
Make the time
We all have busy life’s, and busy days but who says that you don’t have the time! Forget making excuses and shoulda, coulda, woulda’s, make the time for you and what you want to do.
Stay present
Yes we are ambitious and it’s super easy to get swept up in your own thoughts of what should, could of been done, but be it at work or on a date stay present in the here and now.
Evaluate priorities
We all have them, but the first should be you, I’m not saying to neglect anyone or anything but put things into perspective and priories what is important right now for you and what and who is around you, how else, will you be able to achieve those goals.
Set boundaries
There is a time and a place for everything and everyone. Nothing wrong with keeping work and personal life separate, no one has to combine the two or even share the two, remember it’s your playing field.
Have fun
So easy to forget to do, I’m all serious in my 30’s, but serious is not fun, well not all the time, so live a little and step out of our comfort zone and simply enjoy it! A great way to have fun for those older or over 50s dating sites, can be a lot of fun, check out older-dating.com.
Don’t negotiate
Rule number one, your a boss, a girl boss, I know what I want and I work hard for it, so no more negotiating on my time and spending it with someone that simply is not worth it!
Ditch the rules
We’ve all heard the rules, but are there really any dating rules that work? I think not! I’m old and mature enough now to know what I want and what works for me! Instead of over thinking it connect with the person meaningfully you will get a better result.
Have a set time
It’s easy to get carried away at work, you want to leave with a clear inbox and before you know it it’s midnight! A great way to have a set time and stick to it, is by making a to-do list, prioritise what’s important, what you need to get done and work your hardest to stick to it.
You need your own life
Yes we’re are ambitious, career and family minded, but in order to enjoy those things and have a healthy balance of everything, it’s super important to have your own life, meet up with friends, giggle, gossip, shop and simply catch up, to going out and meeting up with that someone and even doing something just for, be it a hot bath to going to the gym and getting in on a class. You have to remember to have your own life you only get one after all so make the most of it.
How do you maintain a healthy work-life balance, let me know in the comments below!
Lindsey
Disclaimer: This is a collaborative post!
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The moment I get a whiff of that glorious Autumn air, I go on a hunt for my new cosy knitwear, mohair, cashmere a heavy knit, striped, I crave them all, but this time around I am loving and buying coloured knitwear for Autumn, the bolder the better. Why? Because nothing boosts your day and mood than injecting some colour into your wardrobe and life.
Now I must stress I am not a fashion blogger per say and can talk endlessly about a jumper and hot to style it, that's not just who I am, not that there is anything wrong with it, but boy am I going to talk your head off and get all fashion-y on this post. You ready......! For me it is all about how it hangs, draping, style and fit, but most importantly can I get more than one wear out of it, well of course, but can I style it multiple of ways, and the answer is yes you can!
Balancing act
Why not toughen up and pair your coloured knit with a vinyl skirt, a must-have essential this season, trousers too. Go big, or go home earrings and some sock boots, you're good to go for a Saturday brunch with some pals, and Threenager for me.
Pants up
Heading to work, why not team up your coloured knit with a pair of wide leg, high waisted trousers, tuck in at the front, let it hang at the back, grab a cross body bag costing less than £17, sunnies on then go grab your coffee and your out, business at the bottom, cosy coloured at the top, perfect combo to cheer up those work days.
Jeanius
Soften the whole look up for a more laid-back approach to your days, than wearing your favourite jeans, shirt underneath paired with some loafers makes for the perfect autumn stroll.
Dress-it-up
Found that perfect knit dress, then rock it with some comfy sock boots and you are good to roll, keep it simple.
Are you loving coloured knitwear? How will you be wearing it for Autumn? I'd love to hear your thoughts below.
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London Mumma xx
With the kids finally set back at school the commute to work has apparently got 15% more crowded! But with how hot and tiresome the commute has been to work these few weeks, which can lead to us feeling a bit stressed, before we have even got to work and in honesty, I'd say public transport is 85% more crowded.
With long days at work, you want to feel and look your best, but the commute can have you feeling the exact opposite before you have even stepped into your office, whacked the coffee machine on and booted up your computer! What you get is you looking and feeling like you've just stepped home from a heavy night of partying and looking like a remix of Freddy Kruger with a blend of Predator! But with a few essentials to help you survive the commute to work, I am sure I will have you feeling and looking fly.
Water
A great way to keep your cool and hydrated on all systems go, whilst traveling to work is having a water to hand, why not purchase a quick bobble bottle, perfect for refilling and keeping you refueled and feeling as cool as cucumber whilst traveling from A - B. Plus by consuming water, it won't just be keeping you cool and hydrated throughout the day, but it is also great for your skin, hair and nails, after all our body is 60% water based, so gotta keep it topped up!
Tissue
Never leave the house without them, great for the hot sweaty commutes and coffee spills, and crumb wiping and snotty toddler nose cleanups.
Transport App
I can not stress enough, if you are on a mad dash to work and not managed to watch any of the news, get your appy on and check what is going down with public transport, nothing more infuriating that running late and not taking a few seconds out to her the status of transport, to keep you on track.
Mini fan
A life saver, be it on the tube or a hot office, where the big debate about having the air conditioner should be allowed on or not. Small enough to pop in your bag and have on your office desk.
Face mist
The perfect cool down after a hot commute, my new favourite is from Omorovicza, that I mentioned in my Friday Favourites and MINTD Box is a must have and still a firm favourite to carry around in my handbag.
Deodorant
It can be a sweaty job this whole tube malarkey so to keep extra fresh and smelling great, as we all know some don't when on public transport, carrying a can or roll-on deodorant is a life saver, after hitting that hot and sweaty transport.
Antibacterial Cleanser
After that commute into work, you can feel somewhat a little dirty, holding on to those rails, going up the escalators, whilst public transport may or may not get cleaned, do you really want to be eating your breakfast croissant with those hands or touting your face, even to push back your hair after the commute and holding on to those rails, or whatever you have found to keep you stabilised for dear life!
Headphones
The perfect way to unwind and block out all that hustle and bustle on the commuter to work, bag yourself some new headphones to help ease your mind into work, with your favourite podcast or album.
What are your must have essentials for the commute to work?
Now I would never give up working, I am not that type of person to be a housewife, well I am not even close to having that as an opportunity, not that I would even embrace it, I am/we are providers for our families. But when I had that time at home whilst on maternity leave, I could not bloody wait to get back to work, I love my kid and all, she is a cutie going through that sassy threenager stage, but I need my own time, does that make me a bad Mumma, like fuck it does. I think as women and society we can face a lot of dilemmas, pressure, and prejudice even, women with young kids should stay at home and do the whole Susie home maker crap, sod that I say.
Yes it is hard, and I feel at times a bad parent, because I do not get to spend as much time with my daughter as I would like, but should I, should we not go out there show our babies, that you know what it is good to work, to work for something, be it a mortgage payment, a holiday, god forbid clothes and food. These are the dilemmas that us mothers, single or otherwise can face. But what some do not realise, we have our own dilemmas and demons and it affects us just as much our children
To stay or not to stay
Yes, when returning to work we do face certain difficulties, such as our children being left in someone else care, they teaching them their A, B, C's and 1,2,3's and thinking that is our role as mothers, parents even. But it is good to have that separation and making sure you child is in the right and safe environment, it is good for the both of you. For both mother and child/ren to have that time apart, it only makes the heart grow fonder, plus your kids can get tired of the site of you.
Sacrifice
When we become parents your life changes from the moment, you see PREGNANT on the pregnancy test and you make the decision to become a parent. Me time, we time goes out the window and it all about kid time! We sacrifice, for our children for their love and to keep them happy and the odd occasion when you want a bit of peace and quiet or your program has just come on! We make sacrifices, for the unconditional love between parent and child, hence why even planning on returning or going back into work is a good sacrifice, not a selfish one, after all, we are providers now and a cheeky 8 hour day so you can have a little me time is not a bad thing. But for all the sacrifices we have to makes as parents, they are worth it all in the end. Even if it means a life time of an audience whilst going for a crap.
Am I enough
We can be our own worst enemies at the best of times, we can doubt ourselves and beat ourselves up thinking are we doing, feeding and teaching our kids the right thing. Everyone's teaching and learning life experiences are different, but what you have to understand and yes I included. I am enough for our kids, I mean Leanora thinks I am all that and then some!
With so many dilemmas we face as mothers, they are all worth it in the end and makes us and our children stronger. Have you faced certain dilemmas since becoming a mother, or father? How have you over come those dilemmas?
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London Mumma xx
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CLICK HERE TO FOLLOW ME ON BLOGLOVIN
YOU MAY ALSO LIKE TO READ
6 Things You Learn In Yours 30's
5 Things Every Working Mum Needs
5 Tips On How To Stop Being Late
With a little forward planning, there are 4 easy ways to successfully keep yourself organised at work and helping you manage your time at home when working. Don't get me wrong I am human I am still trying to master it daily, but with a few little things that I have put in practice, I find that it does certainly help me to be more successful and organised at work.
Today I wanted to share 4 ways to successfully be organised at work.
Work on route
To ease some pressure of your daily work load, why not get a head start on yourself and use that time whilst travelling to and from work and work meetings wisely, and get some work done. You will be amazed at how much you can achieve in that travelling time.
Schedule your phone
You always have your phone to hand, no matter where you are, so why not use the hell out of it, get scheduling and use your calendar effectively, therefore, freeing up actual free time and helping you and your time becoming more organised.
Start with the hard jobs
With a heavy work load and loads of tasks at hand, start with the harder jobs that require your attention immediately, organise what needs to be done and when completed you find that A) you inbox is more organised and manageable B) you become less stressed as the harder tasks are completed and freeing up your time to organise your working area and the following day.
Clean workspace
Clear space, clear mind. Cluttered workspace, cluttered mind, which leads to chaos and progress can slow down and that is not what you want to achieve. So being proactive and getting yourself and your working area and environment organised will help you achieve order.
Personally, you can never be too organised, like I said previously not that I am 100% organised all the time, but it does certainly help me and my working life.
How do you keep yourself organised at work, what are your tricks? I would love to hear in the comments below.
London Mumma xx
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